The cry of my heart!!!!

Among The Thirsty - I'd Need A Savior
From the album Wonder

How many names can I use to explain the love of my Jesus,
the life that he gave and so many times will I praise you today.
I lift up my life ‘cause you’re always the same
And my offering to you I bring

Chorus:
Your name is Jesus. Your name is Jesus.
You’re the Wonderful, Counselor, my Friend.
You’re what I hold on to; I know that you brought me through
All the days of loss, to the cross you knew
I’d need a Savior.

How many songs can I sing to proclaim your wondrous love and beauty so great?
What would I say if you brought down the rain and everyday
I walk through the pain my heart would still say…

Chorus:

You’re what I hold on to; I know that you brought me through
All the days of loss, to the cross you knew
I’d need a Savior.
I’d need a Savior
I need you, Savior

This song more than describes the cry of my heart right now!!! I have been straying from the Lord, being involved in sin that I could not seem to shake. I have been wrapped in chains that I wanted out of but wouldn't cry out for God's grace to cover me and break them. Last night for the first time in a long time, I cried out to my Savior. I cried for His grace to cover me. To rid me of the sin in which I have been dwelling. I desire to break free. I need God's strength to cut me out and bring me back to the narrow path in which I should be walking. More than ever, God knew I'd need a Savior. He rescued me last night. And I am thankful that He will continue to rescue me. He is my knight in shining armor.

My Awakening

I have been home from the ship for 35 days now!!!! 5 weeks today!!! When I left the ship, I felt like I would be coming home to a life that would be peaches and roses, although I wasn't so silly to actually believe that 100%. However, I thought it would be much easier to live for Christ at home, with family and friends who believe in the same Savior I do. What I found when I came home though, was that living for Christ no matter where is hard. I have found that my heart has been hardened. I have realized that the person I am being is definitely not who God wants me to be. I miss my fellowship with God. But instead of seeking out ways to find my Savior, I have ignored it. I haven't gone to church as much as I thought I would, and when I did go, I didn't pay attention much. I haven't prayed. I haven't read my Bible. Overall, I have become numb.
I have had some divine appointments lately though that have opened my eyes to see that this woman has a purpose, a calling in life, and I am wasting it. Then, I went to church tonight and God broke the ice around my heart. The scripture of the night:

This is where God broke my heart. If I can't humble myself and pray, and seek God with all I have, and turn from my own sin, how in the world can the other people in this world find Christ. I have a duty in this world to be passionately seeking Christ and showing the world this Savior. Instead, I have been sitting still, as if there is not a lost and dying world. I just left a ship of 1000 crew members, and maybe 10% of them have a relationship with Jesus. There were 55 nations represented right there, on that vessel where I spent 3 months of my life. I didn't have to go out to the nations. God brought them to me. And I wasted it. I am tired of wasting this life. I am tired of being numb. I want to be awakened, to fight. to serve.

Quotes from Brock Lillis, an evangelist from Tennessee:
"You can be dunked under the water so many times that you know the fish by their first name and still be lost."

"Without God you are like a car without gas. NOTHING."

Pictures from Ship life

Miracle Life

My two closest friends on the Miracle

My Favorite Mexican I've ever met, I love Federico

PRE-My Birthday/Farewell celebration at Supper Club

My Soul mate on the ship, Elizabeth

He's a real cool "Joe" no pun intended

Good friend Sam and me


New York City

Me in Times Square

I'm a big kid!!! What can I say!!!

The day Lizzie and I became soulmates


My favorite cruise

Most of my kids and Kyle, he was adopted into Circle C

Kyle again

Going snorkeling in Grand Turk with my sweetums


Random ports

Riding a sweet horse in Grand Turk

Living it up on the beach in St. Thomas USVI


Half Moon Cay, the most beautiful beach

Lizzie and me taking in the rays

Parasailing, I finally got to do it


Bermuda

I took my teens sailing on a catamaran out in King's Wharf, Bermuda

Just exploring the Bermudian streets

A beautiful Bermudian sunset

My Miracle on the Miracle

Well first off, I need to say that my Miracle experience has come to an end. I have returned home to Mississippi, as I felt I needed to. I want to be with the people who matter the most, my wonderful family. And I didn't feel like ship life was the place where I could be a Godly lady.
So I booked a flight and said goodbye to my wonderful friends. I admit, I cried a little bit when I left the ship. No matter how much I hated it at times, it is hard to leave great friendships that are built.
My soulmate, my Miracle on the Miracle, Elizabeth Ann Pearce, was the hardest to leave. We stuck together our whole time together on the ship. We were disco buddies, port buddies, prayer partners, goof off buddies, girl talkers, best friends, and sisters. I am so thankful that God put us together and I believe it is no coincidence that we met on a ship called the Miracle. It was hard to say goodbye to her, but I have assured her that when she flies to Mississippi in Aug/Sept that I will gladly put a glass of sweet tea in one hand and a cowbell in another and show her Mississippi life. I can't wait til that day.
So, home I am. Mississippi. I was away for 100 days. When I got back tonight, Mamaw cried. I hugged her. I held her hand. I loved on her. It was beautiful. Then I went outside to hug my dog. We sat outside for a while, she in my lap, me rubbing her fat belly, and enjoying the stars. It has been a beautiful day.

I am exhausted, and my face looks like skin cancer (thanks alot beautiful Bahamian beach that draws you in so much you can't leave and then your face gets fried)!!!! I believe I am going to turn in for the night and get some much needed rest. Something Carnival workers don't get much of. Thank God I am home to get some now!!!

Peace, love, and Southern comfort (not the alcohol, definitely the lifestyle!!!)

The Best Cruise Ever

So I just came out of the best cruise I could have asked for. I had such a beautiful group of teens who all loved me dearly. The feeling was mutual. I cried the last night because I was losing them. I even got really close to their parents. On the cruise, I got to kiss a stingray, which was probably the coolest thing I have ever done. I took some great kids out there.

Anyway, I am in Grand Turk right now and the weather is sunny and warm. I am enjoying it. This cruise has not been as great as last but it hard to beat something as good as I just came out of.

Still making tons of friends. Several of us are planning to go to the fancy restaurant on board for my birthday. It costs $40 per person but it is a real fancy like 6 course meal or some hoop la of the sort. Sounds like a good way to spend some money. Haha.

Hope to update again soon.

Great Times

So ship life is turning out to be quite a blast. We had the relocation tour last week to New York City and it was so much fun. I hung out alot with my friends. Then 3 friends and I went out to NYC together and that was great.
I am on a 6 day cruise right now which has been lovely. We went to Bermuda where I took 5 teens sailing on a sweet catamaran. I got to put my feet in the freezing cold Atlantic. It was beautiful. Also, I saw the head of the Bermuda triangle.
I am in Rhode Island today with some friends.
I have gotten quite close with a girl on the ship. She is a Christian so we share that bond. She is such a blast to hang out with. We are now port buddies and hang out almost everyday.
Anyway, computer is dying and I gotta head back to the ship.
Love, peace, and hamburger grease (our burgers on the ship have none, they are too dry!!!!)

Life is Good

So, Carnival life is not so bad after all. I am really starting to get into the swing of everything. I am having way better cruises and am making more friends each and every day. I just finished up my best cruise two days ago. I had only 47 teens in my age group and about 20 regulars. They were dramatic, but wonderful. We went on a teen tour in St. Kitts. We got to snorkel and kayak 2.5 miles in the Caribbean. It was great fun. My teens this week really loved me. I got some great feedback, lots of tips, and a really cool gift.

Anyway, this cruise is super busy. I have about 150 teens just in my age group and already almost 80 registered. I have about 30-40 that come regularly. It is crazy crazy this week, but I think I am going to enjoy this group a good bit.

I miss home still but I am actually enjoying my job now. I feel like I am doing a good job here and I like it.

It will be nice after this cruise, we have 2 days of no guests. We are relocating to New York City. I absolutely cannot wait. I have always wanted to go there and will finally get my chance.

Anyway, the vagabond must go eat. Love ya'll, and miss you heaps.

Marc and Me in St. MaartenMy teens in St. Kitts before the teen tour